Being an Entrepreneur is Not How I Imagined It Would Be

Being an Entrepreneur is Not How I Imagined It Would Be We Built Our Own Castles by Amuletz Yknow that post I wrote last week about there not necessarily being trumpets tied into discovering our Passionate Careers? Well, the anonymous client I quoted there has come out of hiding its Amy McRae from Joy to the Earth! Shes such a smartie and so inspirational (especially for us Renaissance Souls!), I was so excited when she agreed to elaborate. I’d spent a few years following entrepreneurs who had visibly found their perfect career, and had decided that I would settle for nothing less than that.  Settling meant death. If the thought of a particular career did not have me  leaping out of bed in the morning, then I hadn’t yet found the right one. I  imagined that when my dream career would finally decide to reveal itself, my  entire life would suddenly make perfect sense and I’d never be anything but  joyful ever again. It was simple: Discover dream career. Experience everlasting joy. Suffice it to say that, eventually, I got tired of wishing and waiting for my own  unique career to show up, and I signed up for group sessions with Michelle. I  committed to questioning everything I had previously thought as it related to my  ideal career. I felt as though my life depended on discovering my “Thing-with-a-  capital-T,” and made absolutely certain to leave no stone unturned. If you read Michelle’s post last week, you  know where this is going: There never was a breathtaking, lightening bolt  moment. But after several weeks of questioning, even the voices of doubt in my  head couldn’t argue the fact that the same interests kept popping up over and  over (and over) again â€" the same ones that had been popping up for at least two  years, if not for my entire life. That’s how I discovered my passion(s). But to my disappointment, joy still came and went, and I realized that I had,  up until that point, thought of passion and joy as one and the same or, at the  very least, intrinsically linked. If I tried to do work-related things when I wasn’t  feeling that joyful bliss, I would find myself unhappily procrastinating or in  actual physical pain. During those times, my passions seemed like something  I had to work at, rather than something that I truly wanted to do be doing. All  the life was being sucked out of me and out of my projects, and that was simply  unacceptable. I had chosen self employment so I could play by my own rules â€"  not so I could experience a different form of enslavement. I tried to “power through,” and I tried to bribe myself with rewards… but  ultimately, what I’ve found to be the key is letting go of every. single. “have to” â€"  repeatedly â€" and asking myself: What can I do that will really bring me joy right  now? When I let myself be completely free of any “shoulds,” I give myself  the gift of freedom to continuously choose my passions. It’s reassuring to let  myself be reminded that I really am on the right path, and it propels me forward  with renewed focus and intensity. And joy definitely accompanies that freedom. So that’s why there was no Broadway-esque production to introduce me to my  perfect career: My passions were so deeply embedded in me that I’d consistently  overlooked them, and I wasn’t fully aware of the fact that joy is a choice and a  practice… and never a given, even for creative entrepreneurs. I’m glad that my ideal career (or, more accurately for all of us: career path)  didn’t show up as a pre-made, perfectly wrapped package on my doorstep. I have  learned just how much I value room for growth, for creativity, and for tweaking/  revamping the way I do things, as I myself am tweaked and revamped. And I have learned that being a solopreneur is like being a ship’s captain  and, oftentimes, the ship’s entire crew as well. It builds character, it requires  mindfulness, and, rather than having me fit a mold (even if it would be custom-made, in my dreams), it allows me the freedom and the responsibility to create  my world, my way. Amy recently re-launched  the Joy to the Earth eGuide for everyone who equally dreads the holiday have tos and feels inspired to change the world in the weeks and months leading up to December. Shes looking for  creative guest bloggers too!  Follow her on Twitter:  @beyoutifully.